five thousand shades of blue

Friday, April 26, 2002

Actual headlines from today's paper:

PRINCE TALKS TOUGH WITH BUSH
Okay, I know they're referring to the Saudi Prince, but my first mental impression was, well, a short little black dude covered in sequins.

GERMANY FINDS TINY, AUTONOMOUS GROUPS
... of ... one armed midgets? Poker playing dogs? Actually, of Islamic terrorist groups basing operations out of said country. But you don't find that out until the second or third paragraph.

REPORT SAYS MORE WORK NEEDED TO HELP SUCKERS
Ok, so if you actually read the article, you will find they are talking about suckerfish. As a standalone headline, it belongs on an Onion story.

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